Finally, this female decides to write/type, I did write a few pages on and off for a few days and tore them off. With a lot going on(thankfully good stuff) in professional life , I found my thoughts scattered and couldn't gather myself enough to sit down in a place and write. And then there were people and more people and things and more things and events and more events and work and so forth... Life is getting better by the day. I am happy I met Guruji at a tripping point last week where he nudged just enough courage and pumped up some confidence within his shaken disciple. The immense reassurance from his side and the strength in his words when he said, "why do you have to worry when you have me?" created magic. I know what that means when his magic is running through, as much as my parents blood runs biologically in my veins as a matter of chance , his energy runs through my spirit as a form of immense blessing and grace. When the link lies not just in this but in many lifetimes, it is felt more than a surge of physical energy... It is a lot more. I have felt him by my side when there were crying nights, I have felt him hold my hand in times of trembling anxiousness, I have felt him hug me in moments of victory and pull me up and hold me when I felt unsure and failing.
Its my incapacitation when I even in my remotest of thoughts challenge his advice through my meagre science fed human mind. I must trust when he says something. Heart has faith, brain doesn't follow. Its a strange ridiculous fight which I am so sure I am about to conquer.
The key highlights of last few months were the KNOWLEDGE TO ACTION GAP being conquered.
I am happy I got off the procrastination phase and started doing things right away.
So the meets happened , the letters got signed and sealed, proposals got accepted (since they were just laying there ready in the drawer), the phone calls got done, the to do lists got ticked off. And the stagnant energy flowed. I assume there still is some faint inhibition of sorts when it comes to actively going out and saying what I have to say , yet I believe it will come sooner than ever.
As I polish the salad off the bowl tossed with some gorgeous organic goats cheese I ponder over what now? And this question will keep pinching me gently every next moment. Grandma would come tomorrow to be of help and stick around with erratic summer schedule at work. That also means that there would be sound , of television more often than not which I hate. I am used to sereneness of the university area and the perks of staying in a colony filled majorly with retired couples. I love how this noon sun is milder today and is aesthetically beautifying the living area with shadow play of the chickoo branches running across the balcony... The breeze is unusually cool, the parrots have been unusually chirpy today and the adorable cuckoo seems to have lost in her noon siesta... One of the room fan creaks as it goes round and I am in love with the rhythm it creates... feels as if I am in a Railway compartment... And I love how odourlessly neutral the environment is since my maid didn't enthusiastically lit a few incense sticks while she left... Glad she forgot. Neutral is good for a change.
Also the balcony garden has non fragrant flowers today , ABOLI, SHOEFLOWER HIBISCUS AND BLUEBELLS... mystically colorful yet totally without any olfactory stimulus.
I remember my favorite gypsy traveler quoting something philosophical while leaving. I don't remember the words but I have the essence embedded deep in my heart. He asked me to dare to do something which I would never ever think of doing and wanted me to observe how it transformed me from within... He has brought many inspiring people in my life. Ben says first he wanted to be the best version of himself and then he understood that it is a never ending quest , so he changed his life goal to be an inspiration to others. My gypsy traveler wants to keep moving, keep doing, keep changing and make an empire and to lead... I believe he would. The positive pressure he incurs on me to keep doing and keep moving and re proving and out shining the old version of myself is felt high even as I type these lines.
It is precious when your people dream for you and with you. (There may be many others who dream of us though) At this point it feels absolutely blissful to be surrounded with a bunch of dreamers ready to go for a kill. I miss my gypsy traveler and long for a reunion when it is meant to be. Until then I better up my game and pull my socks to see moist eyes smile (all over again)...
Its my incapacitation when I even in my remotest of thoughts challenge his advice through my meagre science fed human mind. I must trust when he says something. Heart has faith, brain doesn't follow. Its a strange ridiculous fight which I am so sure I am about to conquer.
The key highlights of last few months were the KNOWLEDGE TO ACTION GAP being conquered.
I am happy I got off the procrastination phase and started doing things right away.
So the meets happened , the letters got signed and sealed, proposals got accepted (since they were just laying there ready in the drawer), the phone calls got done, the to do lists got ticked off. And the stagnant energy flowed. I assume there still is some faint inhibition of sorts when it comes to actively going out and saying what I have to say , yet I believe it will come sooner than ever.
As I polish the salad off the bowl tossed with some gorgeous organic goats cheese I ponder over what now? And this question will keep pinching me gently every next moment. Grandma would come tomorrow to be of help and stick around with erratic summer schedule at work. That also means that there would be sound , of television more often than not which I hate. I am used to sereneness of the university area and the perks of staying in a colony filled majorly with retired couples. I love how this noon sun is milder today and is aesthetically beautifying the living area with shadow play of the chickoo branches running across the balcony... The breeze is unusually cool, the parrots have been unusually chirpy today and the adorable cuckoo seems to have lost in her noon siesta... One of the room fan creaks as it goes round and I am in love with the rhythm it creates... feels as if I am in a Railway compartment... And I love how odourlessly neutral the environment is since my maid didn't enthusiastically lit a few incense sticks while she left... Glad she forgot. Neutral is good for a change.
Also the balcony garden has non fragrant flowers today , ABOLI, SHOEFLOWER HIBISCUS AND BLUEBELLS... mystically colorful yet totally without any olfactory stimulus.
I remember my favorite gypsy traveler quoting something philosophical while leaving. I don't remember the words but I have the essence embedded deep in my heart. He asked me to dare to do something which I would never ever think of doing and wanted me to observe how it transformed me from within... He has brought many inspiring people in my life. Ben says first he wanted to be the best version of himself and then he understood that it is a never ending quest , so he changed his life goal to be an inspiration to others. My gypsy traveler wants to keep moving, keep doing, keep changing and make an empire and to lead... I believe he would. The positive pressure he incurs on me to keep doing and keep moving and re proving and out shining the old version of myself is felt high even as I type these lines.
It is precious when your people dream for you and with you. (There may be many others who dream of us though) At this point it feels absolutely blissful to be surrounded with a bunch of dreamers ready to go for a kill. I miss my gypsy traveler and long for a reunion when it is meant to be. Until then I better up my game and pull my socks to see moist eyes smile (all over again)...
