Intrigued and Amused

As a Kathak teacher , I have come across several hundreds of students through the years into training... 

As much as I'd like to believe that much of the teacher's personality gets reflected through his/her students, there is a method to this process...

It starts off with the exchange of two extremely important attributes - Acceptance and Surrender.

As years pass the student and the teacher duo come to know about each other both intricately and intimately. It is natural to start seeing each other's strengths and weaknesses as co - humans.

Keeping the respectful line between 'being friendly' and 'becoming friends' is crucial since if the line is crossed the assessment of the student may become challenging and the student may feel offended for any evaluation by the teacher if they become FRIENDS.

I speak from neither side since I have been in both the roles and for long enough to appreciate and value the amazing dynamics that a teacher and a student can share...

I haven't been a big fan of rituals in personal or professional life but a huge practitioner of Discipline. 

Simple things like how one touches teacher's feet give a flash on what's going on within... 

There is much energy that can be exchanged as the student prostrates and bows down before the teacher...

Some students bow from a distance of about a meter, touching their foreheads on the ground... ( I wonder how their heads may feel with the cold non living sensation at that distance)

Some students touch knees (really...)

A few students do the traditional Mahashtrian 'namaskaar karte haaa' with a pranam that shakes in an ancient style,

Some students come and bend and Almighty knows how but manage to slip away before one can understand who was it ,

Some run towards your feet with a 'let's finish this'

A few others jump at your feet and it feels either super ticklish or painful as they bang their head or brush their fingers over your feet...

And of course there are many many who patiently wait for their turn to come or till when the teacher has a breather to truly ENJOY this act of precious togetherness....

Their hands on the sides of the feet and forehead on the foot (they sit in vajrasana), they pause , absorb , feel and let it flow.

This prostration lasts for about a couple of seconds maybe, but gives divine joy to the (Guru and Disciple - in spiritual connect) and teacher and student relation as well.

A the journey from a follower to a devotee to a disciple takes time, once this happens there is a transcendental connect. 

When a Disciple comes into the Energetic field or Aura of his/her Guru, thoughts , frequencies and vibrations are interchanged... There is so much of give and take that happens at that moment which is undescribable and is known only and exclusively within the Duo...

Many spiritual Guru's do not allow any lay man to touch their feet since their own sadhana Shakti flows and may dissipate through their feet...

I have been blessed with best of both the worlds...

I am no Guru, but a teacher to my students and I still say that since the word Guru conveys a very high meaning in my term...

I feel enriched since absolutely loving students have touched my feet with such love and respect that I have been in a blissful Bond with them forever...

Having said that I have been blessed in life and consider my highest blessing that I have found my only Guru - my God , Guruji Naushir. And I have been filled with out of this world blissful healing divine light energy every single time I have surrendered on his lotus feet.

As a mother , I make Kanha observe me as I bow down before elders , Teachers, ( Idols of Gods out of habit since I was trained to bow in a traditional upbringing), in front of nature and my Guru not because of customs but because I genuinely want to. 

However I would never make him bow or prostrate as a compulsion but I want to be able to let him explore and experience what it feels like and how it feels like to do what needs to be done... 

He may chose to emulate me and may or may not learn from example but he must definitely be able to take a call as to whether to bow down , in front of whom to bow down, how to bow down - through experience. There is nothing right or wrong here... 

It's but mere a form of personal choice.

It was a productive , calm and an AMAZING Monday morning.

The vibe of the day is light and fresh. 

I am counting my blessings and making most of this fabulous start of the week. 

Are you?

Tasmay Shree Guruve Namah 

- Prajakta Sathe

Understanding the Student world

Many of us have licenses to drive but can never or may never go behind the wheel. We may not even know how to drive or may pathetically fail a real driving test or may even never attempt driving.

Having a certain Certificate or accreditation of sorts on paper , never signifies that we are good at certain things.

There have been umpteenth examples of theatre graduates who never really made it in mainstream or even for that matter experimental theatre scene.

There are so many engineers, scientists, non-graduates, worker class people who have turned into brilliant actors of their times...

There are so many examples of untrained talents who have made it big in the music world...

There are some amazing self taught painters, sculptures , chefs who have turned the scene 180 degrees for themselves with their exquisite work...

There are illiterates who have created business empires and there are also individuals with Doctorates , double Masters who have failed , given up or gone into depression...

We are a mixed bunch of humans with so many varied attributes in unique proportions in each one of us that there are no parameters to judge one human from the other.

Some make it , a few don't ,however everyone gets what is a mandatory part of living and learning I.e. experience. 

It enriches our feel world, our reactions to external triggers, our decision making skills and much more...

Having said that, I thoroughly respect the evaluation system of education and assessment patterns in the current scenario around.

The reason for an elaborate intro is that enrolling yourself in a Dance class will not make a Dancer out of you.

The parameters of turning a student into a Dancer to a performer to an artist is a long tedious and testing process.

Attendance and regularity come first when one starts learning anything new...

One cannot turn up once or twice a month for the class and then complain that one can't dance, obviously one wont be able to dance...

Lack of regularity leads to lack of understanding, lack of practice and hence repetition of every step or pattern over and over again since by the time one decides to attend the class after a week or two the previous class work has vanished from one's head

This leads to a sense of boredom and then disinterest develops...

Seldom there are students who want to learn more and more...

Yes aspiring to learn more is a good thing but only for people who are regular , sincere and hard working...

With the above three qualities even a seemingly lesser talented student can transform into a surprisingly decent dancer.

The purpose of learning dance may be different for each student , with reasons varing from :

I want my child to be busy 

I want to be a professional 

I want to lose weight 

I want to try this dance style 

I want to tag with my friend 

I want to benefit from the Cultural quota

I want dance to help me express myself better 

I want stress relief 

I love dancing

I like the teacher

I like the way she/he teaches

Etc etc....

Whatever the reason be , unless one isn't fully into it and regular and practicing everyday - let me break the not so good news , one is not going anywhere....

Do you eat tons of food in one day and then say that now I can stop eating for the next couple of weeks? 

Do you gym for many hours once a fortnight and expect to see visible changes in you? 

Why is the same simple logic not applied to other areas in life? 

Lack of Discipline is not only detrimental for progress but also a challenge to the teacher who trains you.

You may keep passing exams and have a graduate certificate in an art form but is that enough? Is that all you want? Non disciplined students who graduate will result in making of non-competent trainers and at the end of the day the art form will suffer.

Let us set our rules straight and right while training the next generation in our respective art forms.

Let us pledge to not let an unprepared student appear for exam just because of the fear that she'll leave our class. 

You work you move ahead, you act lazy you stay where you are or Leave.

One rule can direct things in a better flow.

There are so many students all over the world thinking that maybe their teacher doesn't like them or maybe is biased or partial to a few and hence not teaching us ahead or making us appear for exams.

To all those students, your teacher dreams of you becoming better than him/her , has invested time energy and efforts just to make sure you are better with each class...

The trainer will leave no stone unturned to make a diamond out of you if you show regularity and discipline in practice.

Dedicated to all my contemporaries who are into the noble profession of teaching.

The vibe of the day is introspective and calm.... 

- Prajakta Sathe

Within, beyond and Above

One thing that is commonly observed in kids and probably even many adults is that they tend to lag in with work or perform poorly if they notice that no one is looking or when they are unmonitored.

I have observed in class that some students (irrespective of age) tend to not do their Tatkaars (foot work) with force when they are asked to practice alone or execute their Hastaks (hand gestures) haphazardly when they are revising in a group.

The point here is that undisciplined practice is equal to no practice and results in poor performance. 

This is called half hearted effort.

Learning has to be such because one Wants to learn and not because one Has to learn. There is no point in standing up for repeated rounds of a newly taught piece just for the sake of it.

Even old compositions which are mastered need polishing and oiling after some days just like our good old machines.

One of my taal Masterji Bhola Prasad Singhji used to say , "Prajakta, composition ko perform karogi to woh udkar niche aayega, ye prithvi ka niyam hai. Use aisa ghiskar taiyyar karo ki wo ek baar nikla , to woh Gurutvakarshan se bahar nikal jaye aur Antaral mein ek unchai par bas chalta rahe. Revolving till eternity "

Once any art form enters and circulates in your system , it changes you from within... 

It churnes out the bad from you and makes u better in manifold ways.

You can observe performing artists and teachers of arts live their life so aesthetically 

They are dressed well, their homes are tastefully done, every act they do is laced with aesthetics. 

Observe an artist chopping veggies and fruits , they do it so uniformly and neatly.

Watch an artist maintain his or her wardrobe /car/house - impeccably clean and organized. 

I have been in awe of so many teachers of mine when they would just prepare a typical Indian tadka (tempering) with such precision that the kitchen blooms with divine aroma of food.

Simple things like how to iron press a costume, how to alter a dress, how to Fold clothes, how to pack a tour bag, how to ensure that we are presentable at all times, how to eat sleep and keep well in lifestyle - were all learned from my teachers.

I aspire to see all students who are taking up performing arts to go deep within the learning process and go beyond and above the learning to acquire inspiration for a wonderful holistic living. 

Amen to that.

All set for an eventful day... The vibe is Confident and positive :)

Tasmay Shree Guruve Namah

- Prajakta Sathe

Today is mine!

Today was indeed a very long day.
Full of domestic chores, fitness routine, parenting duties, professional responsibilities, spiritual commitment to my Guru.
The maid called in for a leave making things suddenly unspaced in the preplanned jam packed day.
Had this been a few months back, I would have lost my temper , had mood swings and would have cribbed n sulked and maybe procrastinated a few things...
This day was different.
What regular sadhana under the Divine guidance of my Guru has taught me that what is in our hands is this very moment, the NOW.
Going on the negative scale wouldn't help, instead staying on the solution mode and acting would definitely help the situation.
That's what I exactly did.
What I am learning from my Guruji through his teachings is that I never have to worry about the future.
Neither keep thinking about what's gone...
This has had such tremendous impact on my personality that I have begun to see things in completely different light. I had severe anxiety issues which rose out of fear about the future leading to stress...
I also kept dwelling in yesterday, wasting my precious today, which was absolutely unnecessary and non important.
This year on Gurupournima my Guruji gave me a unique gift. This is the greatness of my Divine Guru to gift me with a precious mantra...
He asked me to surrender my vices one by one onto his feet leading to purification and betterment in spiritual evolution.
This year I have first surrendered SLOTH onto his feet.
Now whenever I feel like procrastinating or lengthening things unnecessarily my inner voice calls out to me.
I ask myself do I own SLOTH?
NO comes the answer. I immediately go on the ACTION MODE. Getting things done and not worrying about tomorrow is getting better by the day.
This is such a fabulous change on all fronts...
Not only did it bring discipline to my daily schedule, it also made me more active placed out, relaxed and well rested.
I am still working on getting enough sleep thought, but I am sure I ll get it in place sooner.
I am amazed that at the end of the day inspite of cut to cut work slots I found the energy to wash four mega tubs of dishes and clean up the kitchen counter spiking clean, wiping the floor and keeping laundry in place.
RD Burman's music playing in the background, I actually enjoyed washing them.
Many a times impending extra chores is a blessing in disguise...
It adds to the value of people in your life, increases stamina, inculcates habits of taking responsibility of making things clean before we call it a day....
I wouldn't believe my eyes and senses the house looks squeaky clean in a matter if 3 hours.
Took a hot shower and now happily typing this post.
How does it get better than this?
Clean home, clean body, clean thoughts for NOW....
Happy is the vibe as I gently let my body sink in the bed...
Inviting and invigorating may be this sleep...
Tomorrow is a new day...
I feel lucky and blessed to have found my Guru, my God at the right time in life.
Tasmay Shree Guruve Namaha.

Revisiting Renew Refresh...

I restarted strength training after a gap of 6 months and boy, I can't tell you how much I missed it.
No other form of exercise has given me an adrenaline rush as high as lifting weights. Progressive overload, pushing that extra bit, increasing one level at a time, doing that last extra rep, that one more lap, adding that plus half kg to the bar is fabulously phenomenal. I can't thank my stars enough for bestowing me a period of coordination where in I have one helluva fantastic Personal trainer at a time where I can go and want to go visit my gym EVERY SINGLE DAY...
No, soreness isn't an excuse, lack of sleep isn't either, I never refuse anything that he tells me to do and I give my 100 percent.... I do full ranges and focus on correct form than quantity. I am working on my endurance flexibility and would like to be able to use core strength while working out...
This time I am going all natural with no synthetic processed protein.
Totally relying on plant and dairy based protein sources that are home made and fresh.
Haven't even had egg whites...
I somehow didn't feel like having them anymore...
I love the fact that all of this it gives me fab skin better concentration, peace and calmness...
I am not sure if I d ever go vegan however I am educating myself about everything and believe that I will follow something that can be sustained for a long time as a lifestyle rather than a seasonal fad.
I would now never go on just a cardio stint ever and always do this brilliant stuff for my good.
I would slowly like to introduce variations in the form of functional training , stretches and traditional yoga.
I d like to strongly vouch for strength training and personal trainer...
We are always one workout away from a great mood.
The purpose of writing about my fitness goal is that it leads to answerability to people who read it.
I have already crossed a long journey in terms of weight loss earlier...
now it will be for my own feel good factor health and fitness.
I feel super and I am loving it!
Cheers :D

Very TOUCHING...

Have we burdened our senses with such information overload that technology is keeping our sensibilities preoccupied to the level of numbness?

Being sensitive is considered a con agreed, but where has our lack of awareness gone?

We can now connect at the press of a button... things are getting as real as it virtually can get....

Right from Skype classes to facetime celebrations to E conferencing, mass broadcasts and going live on practically anything in and out of this world is the trend of the day....

What bothers me is that being technically close in this scenario has made us unavailable for each other in real world....

When was the last time we ve finished an entire coffee mug in a cafe with our loved one without looking at a screen? 

Have we enjoyed and gone through the highs and lows and emotional twirls of a movie without hurriedly checking out for any message updates....?

When have we actually checked into a new place to be with our folks and spend time with them without bothering to check in on status at FB or with tags of people we are with....?

Do we have more moments in our memory than on our memory card???

Do we try and relax recollecting fond times without relying on that hard disk storage that has to by default document every milestone?

What's the rush, why this urgency

Why this mandatory clutter n cramping of data piles???

While GB's of virtual layers cover our senses, we are turning into loners....

What do we miss the most?

Having to hear someone out by listening...

Meeting someone actually and not bothering to show it anywhere....

The magic of Pen and paper....

Letters...why are they so underrated?

Being beside each other with nothing to fidget or swap or scroll in our hands....

Sitting besides not even talking can make more sense if we try to listen to the unspoken...

Silence can be loud...

Hugs, where are the hugs gone....

No, not the buddy, colleague , best friend, pout bestie, cousin posing hug.... not at all....

The real one... where you share warmth...

Where there is an exchange of vibrations....

Where we surrender to the moment in the meet...

Where are the smiles gone....

The sighs of finally seeing someone...

Where is the hand holding gone?

Why aren't there enough kisses around???

Forehead kisses...

kisses on the cheeks, over the hands kisses, on the palms, on the shoulder, on the head and over the lips....

Kisses which show reassurance , care, gratitude, appreciation, love, value and much more... 

Do we hug and kiss our partners, children, parents , friends, loved ones and pets often....

Human touch is a blessing....

And we are bestowed with the boon of feelings... 

With age, conservative approach and social stigma the gift of touch has become either an exploited area or an unexplored aspect in our day to day living....

Many may ask, Why touch when you can tell? 

Why not touch and let it speak for itself...

By touch I am not at all entering the ,

"I m not the touchy feely types baba" zone....

Touch for expression is something so natural that many of us have ignored it  for most part of our lives....

Why not hold hands....? Isn't it a fantastic thing to do? 

Why not Sit close to your father?

why not cuddle with your grandson who has practically missed having you around for all this time?

Elder we get, we need to get gentler more open and more accepting .... ultimately reaching a state of awareness wherein we recognise the power of everything....

So next time let us make it a point to turn off the television and keep our phones away when we eat....

Let us drink our beverages without looking at screens but with full concentration towards what we want to say...

Let us watch a play or a concert without having to record it...

Let us enjoy a party without a surge of capturing it....

Let us experience nature first hand without anything electronic in our hands....

Let us meet and hug more often...

Let us kiss our loved ones appropriately and enough so that we can experience the gift of expression to its maximum...

Let us laugh loud, clap and give each other that high five...

Let us chuckle n blink like old times and gather for a group hug....

Let us breathe and be there right in the moment....

Let us snuggle and cuddle real close with our precious significants...

We will then mean the words 

'i love you' , 

'i have missed you ' 

'you are special'

'i want you to stay'

'let us do this'

'i am all yours'

'we are blessed'

'i am so excited'..... and many more...

Touch and tell...

let it be pure, let it be natural, let it be ubinhibitive, let it be non judgemental, let go of the ego....

Let there be HUGS , KISSES, CUDDLES, HOLDING HANDS, COMPANY and PRESENCE....

We would like to live the gift of life to the fullest and have no regrets....

We would like to come home to warmth and not lonely cubicals...

We are here to share and care....

We are blessed with emotions and feelings....

Let us show what we have got...

Let it be real...

Let it be in sync with nature....

Let it be love based and not fear based....

Let us bask in positivity, joy and happiness....

Let us just BE...

- Prajakta Sathe

Ripe bond...

I was a huge part of my Grandpa's life. C.A. by profession , avid reader and an atheist he was the most straightforward person one could ever meet... He had a no nonsense policy and took responsibility of every action of his. He meticulously planned every single day and worked clockwise may it be in professional or personal life... He gave me one huge gift.... a quote....
He used to call me Sonya. "Sonya, always forgive and forget" he said.... He saw me grow, blossom, rise, drown and struggle.... he always knew my highs and lows... he was the one who always believed in me.... he was someone I could have gone to as my sounding board.... but I realised this long after he was gone... my evolution into mature adulthood did not intersect on his time on this earth.
People in my family still say that I was probably the only person he loved the most in his lifetime... The only time he cried in life was when he bid me farewell and send me off as a bride on my marriage day... He had tears in his eyes when I met him last in the hospital and fed him tea with Marie biscuits that evening.... I left for another city the same night, never to see him again...
There are periods in your life where you choose to be so unaware about everything else , that this precious bond slipped off my palms like dry sand long before I could fathom...
Had it been today.... I could have never ever missed having a father figure in life since I d accept him as my Go To man with full awareness....
Nonetheless.... He was past and I am glad I now know how dearly he loved me till his last breath....
The day he died, I was away attending a family function at Nagpur...
I knew he wasn't been keeping well,
I had visited him just the day I left for Nagpur....
My maiden family hadn't told me that Grandpa was hospitalised since they wanted me to concentrate on my newly married in law's house function...
I didn't have even a faint idea about him being in a coma....
Amidst a poem recital evening where I was sitting amongst a crowd of relatives listening to poetry, I felt numb and restless . There were knots in the stomach and extreme upheaval....
I got up and came down in the garden to call back home....
I just asked, he is going isn't he?
The voice on the other end broke into a teary affirmation....
Such was our bond... I was on phone just when the monitor showed his pulse going down sinking into a zero...
I just knew he was going.... and he made sure I knew....
Some things remain special and unanswered in life....
This evening was one such mystery...
Well, this was about another man in my life...
Ajoba...

Figuring out about father figure...

Having posted about my father, I thought of also posting about how life shapes up for every individual... unique, unrepetative non synonymous are the words that ring in my mind when I think of how even identical twins have a diametrically different experience world...
I was the only child of my parents and I do not know if this makes it a fortunate fact or otherwise since I don't know how growing up in company would be? I was raised with meticulous planning and good cocooning in and out if the house... however this did not make me limited to exposure, however I was definitely more self conscious than most of my peers in school.
Studying in an girls only school, going to learn Kathak where most of my batch mates were girls, my contact with boys of my age remained limited to the gymnastic camp, theatre workshops and playtime mates during holidays. As I ve mentioned earlier , dad was as good as frighteningly absent , I had no brother and next to nil close cousin who would enrich my interaction with the opposite sex.
Grandpa was grandpa and knew exactly what his grand daughter was made up of.... he made sure he pushed me in the right direction at right time..
But... I missed having a father figure in life.... a dad, a pop, a Papa, a daddy to go to... to ask questions about, to tell about some things which only a daughter and a dad can share... that special bond... the pampering care... the feeling of being protected...
I never felt safe of falling back on anyone strong or having a backup plan in the form of a father figure....
This made many things difficult.
The idea of Man/boys/males seemed alien and unexplored... and hence fascinating....
This led to experiences which were very different that most of my peer girl contemporaries.... I will try and share my experiences with people in general in the blog posts that follow....
And by doing this I am absolutely not trying to gain any sympathy nevertheless I would definitely like to Comb through the complex intermingling of trigger action response result circuit that we fall in our adulthood. Dissecting the nitty gritties of childhood influences on Adolescent behaviour has been my personal favorite subject of research...
So far, so good.... I ll call it a day....
They say a blog a day keeps stress at bay.... I hope this stands true for me...
Goodnight folks.
Ciao....

God, father and I

There are somethings which are just there. And we cannot touch them... they are so meant to be... like a few people in our lives or a handful of situations that we face at significant times of our life... if we look back, we 'd find there could hardly be any other way it could have been done and had it been any other way we wouldn't have been what we are today...
It's not just education and upbringing that makes us what we are but essentially the experience package that we have signed up for... having experience again does not guarentee wisdom, very few people evolve and go beyond what life has taught them...
Getting off the philosophical emblem I am going to aim at dwelling deep into my experience world and am going to fetch instances which might be collectively responsible for my present...
At an age where kids crave for an emotionally sound childhood, I was flung on a a dual living for existence... I had a biological mom and then I had my grand mom who raised me... so destiny in a way bestowed me with two female caregivers... one who provided for and exuded a string of attachment...my mother and the other my granny who raised me right from the age of a few months till I was well into teens reliving her motherhood but this time with a tinge of extra responsibility since I was someone else's child.... I stayed with my grand parents on weekdays and travelled to my suburban home to my parents house over the weekend... this made me crave the company of both sets of care givers... Mom was a good influence and a rare company which I craved for.... Dad was a conservative alpha male who was oblivious to the fact that he had a child, he would have been more involved had I been a Son instead of a daughter. That's his upbringing ofcourse....
I had a few traumatic experiences in the childhood as far as my paternal interactions are concerned...
Father has always based his life philosophy out of fear instead of out of love...
Hence Anger was a huge weapon he used to combat me. I use the word combat here which might sound a bit over the top , but in true sense he did. As unpretentious and carefree as I was...like all innocent children are, my child like natural playfulness was scarred for life by his bouts of outrage, hateful expression and egoistic attitude. I was exposed to a highly toxic spiteful language and actions rooting from violence throughout my childhood...
Ofcourse he in turn had his upbringing and circumstances to be how he was..
He had to work very early in life to support his family. Work pressure and financial independence brought him a plethora of ego boosting careless layer to the inferiority complex he had carried till then and then bad company at work made things easy to fall out... language harsh , addictions easy to follow and focus on progress blur.
I remember we had lots of flower trees in our ground floor apartment then. Making flower garlands was my favorite passtime over the weekends... one day I declared I d be making a huge one for our home Ganesh photo frame.... Hence I did.... in my excitement I wore it myself to show my parents how it looked.... I was unaware of the religious aspects of making offerings of exclusivity to Deities then....
Baba in outrage ripped off the garland off my neck and flung it out of the balcony saying I have ruined it....
There was Anger Volume and Hatred in his words....
All I remember crystal clear that my heart pounded heavily as tears rolled down my tender cheeks....
This was my first tryst with Religion based on idol worship which was fear based....
Once I smelled some flowers kept for his Puja, the episode repeated....
Once an offering slipped off my hand and fell to the ground, the episode repeated....
Once I touched God's frame before I bathed the episode repeated....
My mother was protective however she couldn't surpass his Negativity...
My aunt was a Christian. Once she sent Easter eggs for us.
Incidentally it was Ganesh Chaturthi and everyone at home was about to break some fast.
I in excitement served everyone a piece of Easter eggs in their Naivedyam plates....
You can imagine what blasting I must have received to do an act like that...
I was labelled as their official Dharm bhrashtaa from then....
In my college years I was tagged and labelled as an Aashrit in the house which was a huge blow to my self esteem as a young girl...
Having said that I on the other hand was raised by an extremely liberal set of grandparents....
Grandfather a non believer in the concept of God and grandmom a believer in God but an absolute non ritualistic person....
This contrast in upbringing led to many questions in my young mind....
There was confusion about influence....
This made me neither a skeptic nor a follower.
However it definitely caused me a lot of baggage that I had to carry as an adult...
A baggage that was challenging to shed off....
However as I distanced myself from him as I grew up our clashes continued till we blocked each other's worlds from our lives until last 5 years since the birth of my Child Kanha our lives have intersected again and this time better and in a mellow way.
Not because he changed, but I did and the circumstances around me did too... his love for my son is unlimited raised to eternity.... this makes things comfortable and better for the family...
Kanha and my dad now share an extremely strong bond.... he dotes on his grandson while my little one bosses over his grand dad.
It's nice to watch this from a distance....
This time however, I watch as a human...
Completely unattached non involved unaffected and neutral towards both my father and my son.
Now however I have a Voice and assertiveness to put forth my views and principles of upbringing that I want to be executed while raising my child.
I strongly stand by my opinion that as much as I love being a mother, I believe that Kanha is through me and I don't own him...
This is a blessing , trust me it is....
I will try to pen down thoughts more often on this page with no barriers....
I guess life is an open book and venturing into spirituality has made me understand one thing....
It's okay to be vulnerable , it's okay to be dark, it's okay to suffer to fight to rise or not....
After all, We all are learning, are on the same journey, just at different times stages....
On the eve of his 64 th Birthday. I wish him all the best living a life of contentment peace and joy.
Had it not been for you, I wouldn't have been me....
Thank you Baba.

Nritya-Pancham

I faintly remember winning a Trophy as a young girl dancing on 'Ek Do Teen' song from 'Tezaab'. It was a dance competition at my mom's office on the occasion of annual puja ceremony. As I danced without training however with no inhibitions on stage, my mother sensed that this talent needed a structure and discipline. So she took me to one of the most prestigious dance institute in Mumbai at that time and enrolled me for Kathak.

 At that time I remember; for me, it was just a dance class with a strict teacher who told me to stand in a certain way and place my feet in a specific pattern and my fingers to be held close together and hand gestures to be executed in a particular manner. Frankly at that age I had no idea what I was doing and why I was told to do what needed to be done. Dance at that time for me was more interesting onscreen and the class decorum made it absolutely boring. I would complain of feet pain and legs aching and stomach hurting and teacher scolding me. I gave all excuses I could to skip my classes, but my parents kept at it. They would carry me back from class , apply balm and oil after practice and they would wait outside my class as moral support  till my batch was done outside the dance hall just to ensure I kept at it. All that whining finally faded after I slowly but surely saw the difference in myself while dancing as well as otherwise as a student of Kathak.

From a dread hour to a time that I gladly looked forward to, it took me a few years to realize that I belonged to dance as much as dance belonged to me and that my Dance teacher was not just a run of the mill tutor who taught me how to move, but indeed my Kathak Guru who taught me to embrace art as a way of life...

The grooming began on all fronts, I saw my Guru's taking their job of teaching very seriously.

Punctuality was my first lesson, I remember My Guru Ashatai, Soniatai and teachers Babitatai, Anildada always coming before time in class. This inculcated the value of time which I am proud to have followed till date. I also remember them carrying their meals from home and as I grew observing them, I absolutely vouch for eating home cooked stuff on and off class schedule... I saw the amount of hours they took to compose and formulate the curriculum, choreograph new compositions and calculate accurately which student will appear for which exam at what time according to his or her capacity and Tayyari amazes me.

I remember; my Gurus always dressed elegantly and looked graceful for every single class that I have had with them. This made me value personal presentation in my professional life which has benefited me in all ways, All of them had a one on one bond with each of their disciples. I am trying my level best to nurture the values bestowed upon me beyond the aesthetics of dance in day to day living.

After being in this field for almost 28 years now and after attending numerous dance workshops, I happened to attend Kathakatha Antardhara , a 5 day residential workshop at Rambhau Mhalgi Prabodhini organised by Laayangikam Trust under the tutilage of the great Kathak Maestro Pt. Rajendra Gangani 2nd time in a row. As much as last year, this year was even more fruitful in terms of the entire experience from an artist's point of view.

Right from the commencement of sessions as per the given time schedule to unbiased method of treating every student as an equal, this workshop was a page turner in true sense... The very fact that there were almost no mundane chores of daily life there, we had all the time to devote to one purpose that is Kathak. With the various sessions on the power of expression, music , accompaniment, rhythm the Bloom bud of inquisitiveness was watered with a constant fluid flow of knowledge and experience which epitomised us as seekers of Art and it blossomed opening its petals one by one every day....

I have experienced a divine connection and a sacred moment of a very personal and a pure bond that happened as I bowed down over Guruji's feet every morning after Natraj pujan. That Guru pranam was of a different league altogether. A disciple surrenders his ego and touches Guru's feet with full faith and the Guru with full acceptance blesses the disciple and takes responsibility of his thirst for knowledge. This is exactly what happened between every student in the workshop and Guruji. He is a high vibrational soul of an artist at an extremely advanced stage of evolution. This is felt by the way he conducts every practical session in class and the way he interacts with accompanists, co-artists, seniors, guest speakers as well as his disciples off class... He is I would strongly say an ideal example of how an artist should be.

The sessions with Smt.Rajashri Pathak on vocal accompaniment for Kathak was full of lyrical, musical and witty anecdotes. We were lost in time as she explored the folklore music in semi classical flavor that's used in Kathak. Smt. Manjari Sinha patiently answered all our doubts on critical evaluation of any performance and changed many misconceptions about the way articles are or should be written about Dance or any art per say.

The session with Pt. Suresh Talwalkar focused on the intricacies of taal and the way rhythm must be explored and deciphered by exponants. We were blessed to have an evening learning from another great artist Shri. Haresh Gangani teaching some of the authentic heritage bandish's of taal paksh from Jaipur gharana. One evening was spent with our Guruji asking him tete-a-tete questions straight from heart about his journey, kathak, riyaz, teaching methodologies etc. The in house accompanists Shri. Fatehsingh Gangani on tabla and Shri Parihar on lehra and vocals was a daily treat to us students. This year we explored Dhamar taal in practical sessions and an exquisite thumri 'Khelan Hari nikase'...

One of the largest conclaves with kathak performers and students from all over India under one roof was like a truly rare occurance. Exchange of ideas stories and experience made it even more enjoyable. The Kathak comunity is now close knit and wider every year as we make new friends and connect with farther cities and places breaking down barriers of geography and language uniting with one purpose Kathak.

Spacious riyaz hall, excellent acoustic setting, comfortable stay arrangement, clean rooms, vegetarian wholesome food and excellent management made this workshop a memory to cherish forever. A huge round of applause to the founder of Layangikam Smt. Archana Sunjay for organizing this workshop so meticulously. A loud shout out to my contemporaries to come experience this next year by joining the Layangikam family and living a dream of Gurukul in reality.

- Prajakta Sathe

jaga ani jagu dya...

Mansa olakhta yena ha anubhavacha bhag asla tarihi tyat aapli pragalbhata kaami yete.

Mansa olkhun apla sampark aani sahavas tyabarhukum tharavne hyala vyakti chaturya mhantat yeil. 

Mansa paarkhun tyavar swatahacha mat athva tika sarvansamor mandna hi judgement hote

Khota vagna khoti khoti stuti karna garaj nastana bolna kiva vayphal ikadchya tikadchya gappa marna hya goshtinmadhe jyanna ruchi asel tyanni ti avashya karavi

Pan he hi titkach khara ki utshrunkhal vartan patkan olkhu yeta

Eka chashmyatun jag pahun sarkhe Rang disu shaktatahi,

Pan ajubajula khup swant sukhay , gahiri, shant ani sarvasamanyanpeksha vegli ashi hi mansa ahet...

Apan adhyatmik utkranti chya vegveglya tappyavar ahot he khara ahe

Vayyatikritya jari vaicharik bandhilki nasli mhanje manatlya manat apan technically kahihi vichar karu shakto ani kahihi vichar yeu hi shaktat..... tari dusryanchya vyaktiswatantryavar ani vaicharik baithakivar kadhihi tashere odhu naye...

Integrity Genuinity Simplicity ani sahaj sundar sthayibhaav hya goshti rare ahet aani aslya kiva dislya tar tya atyant kaljipurvak japlya pahijet kiva tyanchi kadar keli pahije.

Thoughts over a walk...

There are people who work extremely well using assertiveness as a virtue towards getting things done. 

There are two sides to the coin of behavioural characteristics 

Confidence brings an aura of positivity to the person who exhibits it via body language, speech, tone, expressions and response towards the external precursors...

Things that determine nature of a person maybe his upbringing, experience, maturity and evolution as a human

Humans are far more profound than just an equation of action- reaction...

Some of us are pushy 

Some of us are dominating 

Some of us intimidating 

Many of us, adamantly stubborn

Many intruding 

A few downright irritants 

And these adjectives arise due to differences in opinion of people that perceive us... 

Many chose silence as a tool of response 

This by far is an extremely valid way of communicating since that is when energies speak... 

And right messages are accurately conveyed to people via vibrations...

Those who sense it, resonate...

Those who fail to sense aren't meant to know the response. 

Trusting our instincts and sticking to what our gut says is by far one of the most reliable source of decision making tool ever known to mankind 

It's okay to be selective about the tribe you want to dwell with 

Our frequencies must ideally determine the interaction between Us 

This isn't far beyond the mundane nitty gritties of current busy life of ours, 

It's very much a part of us and a huge part of what we come across 

Atleast it should be...

Having said that, the interpersonal Nuances can be well understood by Us only when we truely understand the difference between 

Calm, quiet, peace, mute, silence and null...

I promise myself to listen more than I hear

I pledge to use words only when I really feel like...

I will keep reminding myself that 

Knowledge is Not WISDOM 

Tasmay Shree Guruve Namaha 

-  Prajakta Sathe

Soulmate triology...

Rains would kiss the earth and that union would be their love making for it leads to the sprouting of seeds that lay within its womb, fertilising it into blooms... the fragrance is heady and alluring for most of us.... unique and non recreable. That earthy essence of union is Love...

Romantic love, love for family , Love for self, love for society ,unconditional love, Universal love... we have categorised the concept for ourselves.... maybe... pondering on the concept of soulmates for analysis I humbly request to take my write up as a perspective.

We per say imbibe this very characteristic of Love and humor (experiencing joy) from the creator....
We try to find and do find our soulmates at different stages of our lives...

There are ones singular or plural who come in our life with a high speed, the passion is phenomenal, the chemistry is full on and we have the time of our lives with them. Everything is on a high... emotionally and physically... There is a But here.... this doesn't last or isn't meant to be... it either has to fade, go away, lead to circumstantial separation and eventually you don't get to be with the person for some reason or the other.... Both of you have a tough time to get over it/ move on/ let go... we have no choice but to accept it with or without mutual consent...

Then there are soulmates that we live with... we get habituated to with bonds of marriage or mutual commitment... There might be marriage on the cards of love and there might be love strung in the twine of marriage... however they are neither inclusive nor exclusive... There is convenience , comfort , habituation , security, collaboration of funds, intimacy assurance (in most marriages) , joys of parenting and the settlement into family life... it's a safe place to be... We love to be safe.... whether we are in love while being safe is another question... we continue to bask in this happy settlement for nore reasons than one. We are bound by our beliefs our conditioning and our traditions...

And there are soulmates with whom we have a tremendous emotional connect... our thinking vibes with similar frequencies , we compliment each other in all ways intellectually mentally and spiritually as well... there is mutual admiration and respect. We might have thought about each other out of the platonic and may have imagined the physical aspect of union in our minds, but we always stop there. We like to keep some things platonic. There is romance in the incomplete. We never even mention about the possibility of togetherness.... yes there is romance of different things sorts.... there is love for the personality that the other is.... we love our personality when we interact with the other.... but that's all about it....

Soulmates come , stay and go... that's the order of life... nothing is permanent. We'd like to believe that love is, but it isn't. We are intelligent species and with our ability to think and design life in a way that most things are sustainable for a longer period of life we make Bonds and commitments and dwell in them making things work for each other and all others we are associated with.

Cheers to all soulmates who were are and will be...

- Prajakta Sathe

Drishtikon

The making of an artist means much more than signing up for a run of the mill class and more so for the streams of art forms typically popular amongst the layman seekers. Many feel that enrolling their young one for a dance class, a drawing camp or an acting workshop would make artists out of them. Little does the common man know that there goes a plethora of talent, hard work, mentoring, practice and experience that goes into the craft of making an artist out of a human .

In yester years, Guru Shishya Parampara was predominantly prevalent and probably the only way to take up any kind of learning. This ensured that living in close proximity with the Guru, the disciples imbibed knowledge, lifestyle, discipline and wisdom through observation and maximum interaction and his company. In today’s fast paced life, students spend time with Guides, Teachers, Trainers for not  more than a couple of hours per week and that too in a commercial class set up where batches come in and go out on a session basis or a per hourly meter. This stark reality hits us big time when we consider our growth into this ocean of creative brilliance that performing art rightly is, it is natural to find ourselves struggling to hold a reassuring hand of a Guru. Learning happens, unlearning doesn’t and this per say is one of the most essential prerequisites of being anywhere near creative field. 

Having said that, I have a brilliant proof to support the myth that we all stand to believe, ‘Where is the time?’ This is the time and if we really seek, we’ll be lead to an experience worth reliving again and again for the rest of our lifetime. I am a changed person after I’ve attended the residential Katha Kathak Antardhara workshop organized by LAAYANGIKAM at Rambhau Mhalgi Prabodhini at Utan under the guidance of the great Kathak Maestro Pt. Rajendra Ganganiji and a team of brilliant scholars, artists and speakers in various fields of Literary, performing and fine arts. This workshop rightly transforms mere dancers performers and students of Kathak into blooming Artists with sensibilities that are gently opened up to absorb experience and exude creativity through various mediums. 

The sheer brilliance of making this concept work, is the presence of one of the greatest gentlest kindest and most humble artist that Panditji is. We lovingly call him ‘Guruji’  A respectful bow to the Master mind Smt. Archana Sunjayji to have taken the pains to execute this dream of recreating a Gurukul experience for all of us through her honest and sincere efforts for the noble cause of the empowerment and unification of Artist community under one roof. When I think about penning down about what I procured from the workshop, I am amazed at the impact it has had on my existence as a human. My outlook at looking at any art form has taken a 180 degree turn and has led me to believe that there is such intricate subcutaneous layering that goes into understanding a work of art or to live as a seeker of  creative repertoire , I am indebted to my destiny and the almighty to have chosen me to experience this first hand. In this article I am trying to compile my understanding and perspective about various seminars talks and presentations that took place during the course of the workshop.

Kathak is seen as a medium of storytelling and the ‘Kathakaars’ took it forward from temples to spread amongst the masses as a link to Godly worship, then it was seen to be performed by courtisians when it procured its ‘Rajashraya’, it then slowly but surely got its due of being amongst the enlisted official classical dances from India to be performed on stage and appreciated by classes. When I say classes, I wouldn’t try and give it a second thought since even till this date classical dancing remains to be a topic of investment of time efforts energy patience and of course money for many years until it starts yielding its so called fruits in terms of commercial profit. There still lies a major confusion amongst many people about the differentiation between Traditional, Contemporary and Modern dance. This can be cleared when one understands that content and presentation are two different things. Similar ideas can be presented by various artists in diametrically different methods. ‘Sahitya, Sangeet, Chitrakala and Shilpakala’ readily contribute and must ideally be contributing to understanding of any dance form. A seeker must read, write, watch, listen, imbibe, soak and absorb all of the above to start his/her journey into transformation from a seeker to an artist… All artists are primarily seekers and chose to remain so…. However, not all seekers turn to become Artists.

Kathak has a language of rich abstraction yet it is never ambiguous , it is strung by ‘Vishay vastu and kram’ i.e. definite rules yet it lends liberal and ample freedom of expression to a performer. This makes it an art form closer to us, hence naturally loved and understood by the audience as well as the performer. ‘Tatkar’ is its inner pulse, ‘Thaat’ is a dynamic fluid image with subtle undercurrents of minimal movements from top to toe, yet what  it exhibits, is phenomenally striking and an epitome of grace. The initial ‘Vilambit laya vistar’ presented by a Kathak performer is rightly called ‘Thaat bandhna’ Performance is described by many as an act of sacred meditation yet to many it seems like a ritual of practice and delivery. Unless the dancer’s body, mind and soul are aligned with syncronicity, there wouldn’t be any so called ‘magic’ happening on stage. There is a difference when a performer dishes out ‘ Waah waaa’ from the public while an ARTIST generates a spontaneous ‘Ahhh ahahaa…’ from the audience. This is called a ‘Daad’.

Kathak is a dance form equivalent to the highest level of Yogic concentration. ‘Bols’ are intraforms and the ‘Padhant’ compliments the rhythm and hence the body, mind and soul trio unify during the recital enveloping the audience into an amalgamation of ethereal ‘Rasanubhava’. Here body is only a means of expression and ART takes people beyond their bodies. Riyaz makes the artist accept and assimilate the language and add on his/her own uniqueness to its translation while performing to reach out to a space beyond the mundane world. An artist must be engrossed in music, poetry, listening, hearing, music, writing and practicing. Programs come by the way and fishing programs must never be the sole purpose of learning. All art that we are doing today is Contemporary because it is a present practice happening in real time. Artform is like an ‘Ittra’ or an essense which translates itself into a fragrance when exposed to air… To every individual it signifies different meaning, for some it’s a smell, for others it becomes a treasured memory which they recreate by whiffing it constantly over their wrists or from the tiny bottle of perfume… Some may hate it  a few may love it…. Whatever the reaction it generates no one can deny its existence. 

All these artforms are closely interlinked with each other where Dance as a medium of articulation has its language in the form of ‘Chalan’, ‘Raag roop’, ‘Sanchari bhaav’ and ‘tatva vistar’ where in right from the posture to stage presence, from gait to aesthetics, from content to style everything comes under a scanner and is magnified to critical opinion as a natural progression. Performance in its physicality might have miniscule ‘Kshanbhangur’ existence on stage but by default has infinite life in the memories of the audience artist and accompanists so much so that every performance becomes etched on to the growth graph of all three components. Having said that, many artists have command over fractions of beats, mastery over ‘anvat taals’ or ‘laaykari prabhutva’ and the nuances in his craft, but very few are able to create the so called ‘Magic’ on stage. Here is one of the reasons : A performer shows bhaav with the help of ‘Ang , pratyang and upang’ over a thumri rendered live on stage, an artist becomes the Thumri. This is the highest point of joy to the seeker. Artist, accompanists as well as audience all become equal seekers in this sacred act of creation. Success  is established when THE dancer disappears and the Dance remains.

The quintessence of Kathak is that one needs to be blissfully engrossed in the sheer joy that the dance exudes. It may be in learning, practicing or watching. The quiddity of being the so called ‘exponent’ lies in the fact that one gets to readily open up and accept everything that one experiences as a ladder towards growth, there is no right or wrong and everything needs to be respected as a perspective. That is why the tenet of not sticking to the tickmarks in a preplanned presentation holds true for any presenter. What happens on stage is in no control of the said components involved, one can do the best by preparing his/her best and then let the artform take over. 

When a Kathakaar chooses to do ‘Swantsukhay Abhyas’, Kathak becomes a Yog stringing together the ‘dekhya, seekhya, rekhya’ into a blissful state of ‘ pariksha, chintan, manan and aakalan’. This is the holistic approach towards Kathak. The Kathak scholar Late Pandita Rohini Bhate rightly mentions ‘padhant’ as chanting of ‘Bols’ where the ‘lay ki karvate’ is observed through its loops and knots in the filigree of composition. One must be a Yogi who is pro-chanting and consider ‘Bols’ as mantras repeating them so much so that you get ready for the next step i.e. Improvisation. ‘Padhant’ is the poetry of ‘taal ang’ where the artist lights a lamp via perfection and ignites thousands of lamps in hearts of the audience through it…

Riyaz is a ‘yagna’ where in there is ‘samarpan’ ‘prarthana’ and ‘aahuti’. ‘Seekh’ and ‘tayyari’ manifest in an experience which is sublime yet definite, defined yet difficult to describe, immaterial yet gross and yet extremely personal and private experience to each and every person. When a dancer explores the ‘Avakasha’ or the space zero, he builds structures, geometry, designs and patterns on and over it and within it and beyond leading to a state of SO-HUM, where everything becomes one and there is one in Everything…. This ‘YAGNA’ is irreplaceable and inevitable. Broadening our minds, emerging out of mediocrity and choosing to refuse to become a victim of influence can lead us to a step closer to embracing our uniqueness as an individual. Knowing where to bow and when to stand up is the marker that will set us forth as dance exponents, seekers of experience and culminating into artists. 

This rightly explains as to why a ‘ Bharatnatyam’ performer must visit a painting exhibition or a Sculptor must attend a classical concert or an ‘Instrumental performer’ must see ceramics being made or a ‘Kathak dancer’ must go to see ancient Temples and caves not merely as a tourist but as a student… We do not need to understand everything we see to enjoy it. Dropping our conditioned beliefs towards a set of likes and dislikes and leaving our prejudice and assumptions aside, we’d be ready to go inside an exhibition or an auditorium as one person and emerge out as a changed person. There has to be more unlearning in order to open up our pores to absorb the wisdom. ‘Kala’ per say is ‘Saarvbhaum’, we do not need to understand its grammar to enjoy it, we just need to be present there at the moment of creation and it will give each one of us what it has to. 

I dedicate this article to Natraj, Gurutatva and to ART that was, is and will be ever created…

- Prajakta Sathe. 

Contemplating...

We come across so many people at different points in life. 

They seem strategically popping up at specific intervals.

We must be thankful to them for showing up. 

They have played the roles they have to play and also have taught us what we need to learn. 

There are no ifs and buts and what ifs in the way they meet us.

With time , age and experience, people fail to surprise me. 

Not that I expect wondrous miracles or melodrama...

But I kind of know to what extent a human can be good , not so good, intelligent, not so sharp, hardworking, lazy, psychotic, normal... 

All types, kinds genres, professions seem to have surpassed....

There is now only one distinguishing factor...

Energy of that human and his soul evolution...

What matters is if they vibrate in frequency attuned to mine or if there is a discrepancy in it...

I no longer fall in love or get in the awe zone... I don't even get disgusted or offended...

Because I know it's a journey and it's individual and unique and not same for all if us...

I live and let live... I talk with people I want to talk to...

I hang out with my tribe. 

Where I don't fit, I don't dwell. 

I don't give the keys of my happiness to anyone else....

I take responsibility of my own behaviour 

I am not afraid to call dud a dud and spark a spark...

This fearlessness has got to do something with being unpretentious and non judgemental....

If I ever get late because I overslept I will say so. 

If I am envious of anything I will talk it out to my Guru and ask him to help me get over it

I am a human and it's normal to have all emotions sprung up at times...

Yes there is power play.... yes there are ego issues at times...

Yes I struggle with a few issues in my personal life...

But I don't sugar coat. I want to be real and that's the goal...

There is a difference between rawness and realness...

With what you see is what you get , there are going to be pointers on various virtues...

On integrity on maturity on loyalty on personality and all the frills it comes with.

I would any die with clear conscience than lose sleep over democratic candy talk...

I have realised my strengths earlier than the weaknesses, for some it's the other way round...

But there is no option but to eventually come to know of both... 

As I type this post today I am so happy that I said No when I felt that I needed to stop something that happened a few minutes back...

I am also glad that I spoke my mind and out forth exactly what I felt like to a person who was with me...

I have a clear mind and calm heart today.... 

I know where I am Heading and exactly what it is going to take where I want to be.
There is no rush, actually no point in pushing too... what is meant to be will turn out to be exactly as it's supposed to be...
We are all seekers of one thing or the other...

So off I go on a quest...

I am eager to connect with everyone from where I m destined to be....

God bless us all...

We are good folks...

And we must know it...

- Prajakta Sathe.

Banks of Krishna

Wai happened as a pleasant surprise. Not only for its comfortable stay Nd excellent weather, but for its sheer timing and placement in the hectic schedule of vacations. Summer time is always full of to the dot pre occupied calendar. First part of May goes in the workshop and the latter part goes in a pre registered courses that I take up every year. This year I got free on the 13 th which was the last day of the workshop at my institute. The workshop was about artistic grooming and expression through different mediums. It was a grand success... Immediately after that I did a short script writing course at Learning Cinema conducted by the national award winning writer director Veena Bakshi. Two weeks of intensive training took me from a writing enthusiast to someone who now understands what it takes to write a feature film script. Though I have a long long way to go before I even think of writing a good script, I am on a good phase. I have my idea and concept clear. I must start writing really soon. It was good that my maiden scripting work was torn apart by the panel of critics... it's fantastic to be at a place where I am in writing a screenplay - zero. Excited to start over again asap. Doing the homework for it is fun. 

Wai was gentle, specially the Krushna river... it did show its aggressive face in the evening while we rafted... plus this is the closest I have been to nature since a long time... I was so happy basking in the quietness... there was green and soft sun and hammocks and coolness in the air even in the noon... the bullock cart rides, the unlimited fresh sugarcane juice, the post dinner long walks and the tent stay was breathtaking. The back door of my tent opened in a yard of lillies... what a sight to have... the lock of my tent was camel shaped and life size murals were painted by local artisans on the doors... the shamiana, the baithak, the veranda of every tent lended a cosy and inviting feel. The place was interspersed with terracotta art pieces installed strategically at various places. They took care of making it feel decked up without looking exhibition like. The food was wholesome and simple. 

What I loved is the house of Nana Phadanwis, it had such a romantic old world charm. There was nothing dingy about the one man narrow dark steep staircase and box like rooms with tiny windows.... the wooden work was so strong and intact. I wish they maintained the outskirts of this heritage place better. I was highly enraged when people littered right outside the Vaastu. I pray and hope this is declared as a heritage conservation project soon. It was funny how the men from our group got trapped in the 'wada' as the caretaker locked them and went on to cook for herself at the ground floor kitchen. The rescue operation took a few attempts since our voices from out couldn't reach her deep inside the kitchen... an instance to remember. I fell in love with the 'Ghat' outside the place. It was picturesque,  well conserved and clean. The huge 'vad, pimpal and umbar' trees surrounding the ghats lent chillingly cool shade right amidst the scorching sun. It was mystically alluring. I didn't feel like leaving the place and wondered how it appeared in the evenings... I am sure it would be magical. I am going to be revisiting it again and then going here in the evening. The open banks of the river at the other side of the Dam was phenomenally windy and beautiful in the evenings... I can go there again and again just for the sheer feel of the romance of the evenings near a water body as natural as it is.... Amazing is an understatement when I describe the aesthetically wonderful Narsimha temple. It is an architectural wonder built on a huge well and carved out of stone. I loved the beauty and I secretly wish to shoot at the place one day soon. The temple is clean. However again the place outside the temple is extremely filthy and full of garbage and stink. The Dholya ganpati is very very big idol but it fails to impress. The temple is ancient but very noisy and doesn't lend any peace... We did manage to make a quick factory tour to Mapro which was fun. Tasting various fruit n flavor based drinks n jams, shopping and eating ice cream was thoroughly enjoyed. I so wished and carved for a star gazing night... it was pitch dark... however the resort people didn't shut the railing lights. Night enveloped our tents as we played a few card games. We all slept like a baby. Wonder how, but Wai presented good sleeping pattern to me. I am a happy and a refreshed soul. Rutu farm gets a 4 on 5 stars for its hospitality and comfort. I would love to revisit this place again soon. To experience better and emerge enriched... 

I am counting my blessings as I type this blog in the comfort of my AC bedroom. I feel grateful for everything that I have and I don't have at this given moment. Another day marked in life... the quest for Living the moment...continues...

On the way to Wai...

This is from a recent trip I made. With a tiny doubt in mind , I set for a journey with my folks... my relations by blood and by birth along with a few people whom I was supposed to be with. I always start journeys with hesitancy and somehow every time it fades out as the travel period progresses... We start later than we were supposed to, but i neither crib nor complain. I am okay, this time I have taken everything more than required... stuff and time both... ample is one thing , abundance is another... I collect things in anticipation, I am boring that way... I plan and execute with precision... I rarely like surprises however I d like to improve on Spontaneity... thats been a personal goal for long... in the bag there is now a book and a pen... earlier it used to be a book to read... now I require pages to write.... and ample... sometimes I feel like scribbling sometimes I like to doodle n draw... random memoirs penned down... outspurs jotted down in points thoughts or sentences... 

Not that reading it bad.... but I find it thoroughly over rated... so is writing. Anyone can and must write... it's no big deal... when I write I suffer a bout of verbal diarrhoea ,complain my friends and I write too much... one must always do things one enjoys... do u ever complain that you get way too much salary? Lol.... no right? And thank God I don't have a fan base yet... I do have followers who read my stuff. But for most reasons they read it out of curiosity more than their liking for my style. Maybe because I don't have a style... I am not a student of literature neither have I ever been trained in writing. However I know that I can write and I must write just like any other man or woman can and must... 

Just another thing that I d like to jot down... I ve got some 67 odd friend requests on a single day and they seem to pour in and pile up with time.... I had no mood to go through them... however out of curiosity I checked last time and the requests were 116 on Facebook. Like... really? And why? Why so now? And why suddenly ? My filters are proper... only friends of friends can send me requests... but then again... it shouldn't affect me... however it is to an extent bothering me.... anyways... that's a part of what I am thinking about....

A lot many things are coming true via wishful thinking.... I was thinking about a pending payment that I was receive and it arrives in my account within a few hours... things are extremely meticulously planned to perfection...

 No matter how much we push, they will always happen when they have to... in this way I seldom think about how and how long I have come from. At a time I can see myself... I was extremely low on confidence , conscious to death, closed and timid girl to what I am today...

I opened up and started accepting consciously out of choice... this was more of a confident embrace to situations in life... there were lessons and then there were lessons... some surprises, a few dud pricks... 

I have started to realise the humongous pressure of the What now ? Or now what? And then? - questions... these don't give you space to breathe and for me Breathers are more important than the actual important events in life... 

The gaps prepare us to face the Fulls... when I was sitting in the car, I was cold then I was very hot, I was sleep deprived yet my mood wasn't shifted to the wrong side. We listened to a lot of music, surprisingly I sang many many songs.... after a point... The music too got boring... how much would one listen? Then we switched everything off... no one spoke anything... it was beautiful listening to Silence... we ate when we got hungry and closed our eyes when we wanted to... this ready to go jumping girl in me was good and well under control... 

And I am happy to be here at Wai , where life has slowed down..

 For good...

- Prajakta Sathe. 

Thin line

Indifference and non interference
Giving space and making someone feel left out
Caring for and being worried about
Loving and attachment
Helping out and over burdening someone
Inclusion and acceptance
All have a very very thin distinguishing line...
Let this not be flimsy but very clear...
Life is already a blessing.
Let us be.
Let us value the solitude we have
Different people act and behave differently at different times according to how situations are and it's perfectly okay
You can't expect a person to be perfect in your perception at all times
We all faulter
We may or may not realise
Once a thief need not always be a thief
Every person has a story and a valid one for him and her
That tale being relevent or irrelevant to us doesn't make it less important...
All of us are learning...
Education doesn't signify wisdom
Experience is never directly proportional to age
And it's human to be judgemental however this very thing needs to be unlearnt as we evolve
It's simply RUDE to Label and hence futile to gossip...
There are so many blessings in life...
Quiet doesn't meant peace
Not doing any work doesn't imply enjoying solitude
It is crucial to be aware of what's going on with US just us...
No this concentration on the feelings core won't make us self centred....it will make us more gentle more calm more human....
Let us all be... just be...
Nothing more is needed...
We all are doing our best at what we already do...
Let's just keep doing that...
Let the perceptively negative go behind...
Smile more...
That's what is needed....
Hearty laughter
Genuine acknowledgement
Hugs... tight hugs...
Holding hands...
Walking together....
Sitting besides each other....
Breathing the same air...
Feeling the connect....
We don't need to meet to bond...
We are already a part of each other in more ways than one...
I feel so blessed...
Tasmay Shree Guruve Namah
- Prajakta Sathe 

There are no enemies...

There are friends and there are friends
A set given to you by birth and blood
A set which you acquire and build over time
A set which happens by default and by company and habits
We like to call them family, relatives, best friends, buddies, pals, partners, acquaintances, neighbours, colleagues, comorades , batch mates, people known to us, people that work for us, our bosses, our HODs, our CEOs, people who ve taught us, people who have served us, people who have troubled us....
All basically are friends...
We call them friends because by choice or by chance, they have touched our lives in one way or the other
If they were ever in contact, their presence was meant to do what it did to our lives
If they are absent, their purpose in our lives is done with...
Whenever I say they, I also imply We/ us...
So either they wear off, die, distance, they are forgotten, they move away or move on...
Here distance per say is not just physical...
We move out and move on emotionally , mentally and vibrationally as well...
It's surprising to see that folks we used to hang out with and so close with at one time are so far away that we wonder what made us connect in the first place...
One thing is that our navigation charts are so different yet in subtle ways co related that every contact is absolutely significant and inevitable even if it's almost unobtrusive...
I have spoken about blueprint destiny and contracts in my previous write-ups
When I mull over the intricacy of this filigree of correlation I am amazed at how perfectly our HI and Bye points are planned in a lifetime.
We can and we must never ever say I REGRET...
Taking that path, choosing that course, taking that decision, selecting that person, getting married to this man, dating that woman, falling in love these many times, investing here, splitting up there, spending so much, earning this much, going there, coming out of that place, agreeing with them, fighting with them, accepting someone, ditching someone, getting duped, being cheated on, drifting, boozing, doping, letting her go, letting him stay, taking them in, asking them out, messing with some, getting serious about some....
What ever it might be, has made us what we are today...
Had it not been for that one instance or that moment , however miniscule it may be, we may not have been what we are....
It's the very mud n matter that we are made up of...
Grossly and ethereally...
Mistakes, achievements, crimes, collaborations, withdrawal... every bit of thing that happened has contributed on what we are....
I thank every single being that has contracted with me and consider every one as a Friend and a teacher...
I have no regrets...
My body of mere 5 elements may be perishable , and I won't be there after a set period of time in this appearance...
But I know that my soul is eternal and these friends have been with me in various roles in different lifetimes....
However good or bad the experience has been, every CONTACT was a CONTRACT and every soul is a FRIEND...
NO REGRETS...
ABSOLUTELY....
Tasmay Shree Guruve Namah
- Prajakta Sathe

Omnipresent

Life happens between the nights of blissful sleep and sleepless nights...
what disintegrates in the game is a part of cosmic dust that we already are...
into nano particles of existence that we failed to recognise...
 we keep shredding into minisculeness until we become so thin that our residue amalgamates into a cluster....
we realise it's time for rebirth...
we never knew that it was death...
 until it was time to be born again and again into a vortex of partification.
No this isn't a facade, it is a real game, believable and true...
Procreation that we think we indulge in is nothing but a rule of this contract.
The entities that we say are living or non living are always THERE just in a phase of transition. Death is right here and so is life... we Live even after we die... we keep dying while we are living...
 Soul is eternal... we put on coats of physical bodies and try to see it in dimensions within our reach and capacity...
There is so much more to see than the world, this and beyond....
Movies based on theories of dimensions facinate us... mind , subconscious , regression , progression entice us....
we'd never know what is in store until we proceed into the infinite...
 to have more than knowing more than wisdom...
 the realisation of SELF....
The awakening leading to Enlightenment... and there is more to it my Guru says... it's just a state for a few moments.
Once it gets over,the real journey starts.... where are we now?
Are we even close?
 Have we found our Guru?
 Questions we need to ask ourselves....
Thankfully, I have surrendered to my God who has held my hand forever.
Tasmay Shree Guruve Namaha
- Prajakta Sathe 

Flow and the flowing

And then there are people who are forgotten
In the hustle bustle of schedules
Busy-ness, being occupied, being productive, being creative , being successful, being something for someone of someone by someone...
Sometimes with compulsion
Sometimes with obligation
Sometimes obsessively
Few times by choice many times by chance
We like to indulge in some activity or the other
Doing nothing and having nothing to do are two different things...
The forgotten people are out of sight and hence out of mind and so out of touch...
Suddenly one day they are gone...
And nothing shakes within...
Our routine continues...
Because for us they were anyways almost not present...
They must have been significant to their folks, well... maybe...
They may be missed by them...
But we, remain unaffected by their 'NO MORE' status...
What we forget , however, is that we too are a long lost faded and almost vanished memory already for many...
And after we are gone, it won't matter one bit to them...
Actually it won't matter for anybody for that matter after a few days of mourning...
A few of us like to believe that our presence is indispensable for our people or for peeps in our inner circle...
But then, really , life moves on...
Physical presence, absence , living, dead will only be missed for a few days...
ADAPTATION is one of the most natural virtues of life and so is evolution...
We are okay with presence... we ll be okay with absence too...
So where and why does this EGO or AHAM come from?
I am this, I have done this , my parents, my kids, my office, my home, my money, my career , my life, my rules, my love, my knowledge...
It will take a lot to drop the 'MY' and the 'I'
To emerge knowing that we have infinite potential and are the very parts of the Ultimate, yet be humble and surrendering to what happens....
Giving our very best and then easing out to let destiny take the control is a universal truth
What makes us different from a few others, is the fact that some of us accept it and some fight it....
It's funny how we refuse to believe that we don't have a choice here...
Blue print is planned by us and our contracted souls along with our masters in a way which benefits for our ultimate good...
Why crib? Why chose to sulk and be negative or gossip?
Let go, leave it, set it free, breathe....
It's going to be fine...
All of us are PRECIOUS...
Tasmay Shree Guruve Namah...
- Prajakta Sathe 

Child-like...

Innocence is a virtue very selected few retain as they grow in age. When I say age, I consider it as just a number. Neither does it indicate maturity nor does it indicate experience since both are exclusively case specific and extremely variant according to individual.
                    To support my observation I d give example of my son Kanha, when he goes down in our society compound to play , he carries his play kit with him. Its bat and ball sometimes, sometimes racket and shuttle cock and at times pencil n paper for a treasure hunt. That day he came with a new blue ball, I asked him about it, he said that a friend had given it to him since his ball went down the drain. I had my doubts in mind, if he had indeed been given it or had he taken it without his friends permission. I asked him and his reply was the same... "my ball went down the drainage slit so he has given me his ball."  With my conditioned principles in place I coaxed him to return it the very next day and got him a variety of balls. He was happy....
             I casually observed them play one evening, none of the kids got shuttle cocks all had rackets... Only Kanha kept taking his shuttles down... it's easy to lose more than a few each time the shot goes off and the shuttle lands on a roof or a garage shed or beyond the compound in an overgrown wildfoliage. Within two days full set of shuttles was gone... "Now what are you going to do when this last shuttle gets lost Kanha?"
"Someone will get it from their house or I will ask you to get a new set" pat came the reply...
There was no calculation , no pretentious judgement of other behaviours, no manipulative actions....
Pure plain and simple motive PLAYTIME.
If everyone was enjoying, all was good...
And I was stunned as to why I wondered if no one got their play gear but my son...

           I felt extremely embarrassed about being this Non-innocent. Thankfully the last shuttle lasted that day...However,  the very next day I did not forget to buy a new set of shuttles as I headed back home from work...
This innocence is precious and non negotiable...

I love it when HE giggles behind the curtain when we play hide and seek at home...
I love it when HE asks me guess who's this?- as he closes my eyes from behind...
I love it when HE asks me to play school school, role playing of a chef with water in some vessels and spoon...
I love that HE calls cricket - bat ball....
I love it when he still uses the words 'maau, bhu bhu, anga, mum mum'
He asked me what happens to the stars when it's morning ( I did explain it to him with a proper globe and a make belief modelled experiment) - the wonderment was innocent...
I love it when HE asks me where did dad's cold n fever go, when he recovers???
I love it when HE comes to make me smell his hands every time he washes them...
I love it when HE finds sneezes funny...

Yes they ll grow up....
Yes they ll learn the manoeuvring...
Yes they ll become smart...
They ll be successful....
But WE have just this bit of time till they grow up to enjoy their INNOCENCE....
I have this strange hope of finding my Innocence back, amidst the hustle bustle of fast track days and run through of masks and merits of this number that defines my time on this earth this till now....
 - Prajakta Sathe