ahh...25 good years of life in mumbai...in India...in Asia...on planet earth...in our solar system...in this galaxy....in this world...in this universe....Makes me feel so small, tiny, timid, inconspicuous...so very unobtrusive....very very....i dont know. but i m for sure getting more n more confused about my identity and purpose of being here as i get older. ideally it shud ve been d other way round, but its not!!! so, it b. plus i shud be calling this my silver jubilee year rather than quarter life. calling it the latter only makes the whole thing look so negative. so i call it d silver year...wow....sounds good to write at least!!! and i call it quarter life coz i m greedy and still think in some crazy way that i m gonna make it till i m 100 years old. my friends call this over confidence and let me know dat 75 shud be something i shud aim for and not a full 100. ahh, these friends... always ready to pinch u and correct u at unnecessary places n time. hahaha...my birthday was good. mom had come to stay over n pals called up at midnight to wish...many calls a ;lot many smses; busy cell phone;lots of wishes; more n more expectations and yet another year to compete. compete? did i just mentioned some competition? oh yesss i did, and this one s for a lot many things. my life (read love life, career life, emotional life, physical life , financial life, spiritual life etc etc etc...) my self and d people around me...all culminating into an ever enriching experience of wot? lets call it maturity? aaammm.....not exactly, call it growing on rather than growing up. hehe coz the former makes things look more young for me. and yes, wot all do i have to worry about? is it about fine lines and wrinkles and possibilities of under eye circles...weight issues, sagging, tonning, shaping up? or botox n fillers n body contouring and liposuction and lip augmentation ....or rhinoplasty and plastic surgeries????? possible hair styling , colouring , perming straightening or hair extentions ....chemical peels or skin lightening services offered at leading sa;lons all over d place? is it to early for me to get into all this things? or its never too early to start? is pleasantly plump good or curvy better or curves at d right places nice? do i have to worry about dat apple or pear shaped body and keep aiming at wot all of us call as a puuuuuuuuuuuurfect hour glass figure? does baby fat or chubbiness linger on till late twenties or is it just an over indulgence of junk? loads of questions and helluva answers. new resolutions, some major decisions and of course some huge life altering situations....all in one a super year. i go back and ponder about it and realize dat i ve lost some and gained some. yeah completing masters and settling on a steady income was an obvious expectation but besides dat i also lost some people...most loved ones... ajoba left us in December. cant believe dat its almost one year dat he isn't there and yet life went on and on...smoothly as ever after d initial swings of missing him. and a heart relationship with a very very close person in my life got sour...very sour.... hatered emerged as a byproduct leading to a disturbing void. a space which wont probably b filled in by any one else ...ever. lots of tears and depression bouts followed and some still accompany me as faithful friends. he who left isn't even aware. anyways, life goes on.... and yes made some unnamed unusual and beautiful relations all over d place. it would b unfair on my part to not mention about them. 3 to 4 new friends , rather soul mates discovered have made my life easier. i have ears to tell my stuff and pour my craziness. all of them are brilliant people in their own which ways since they can handle a crack pot like me. i wonder about wot bad things have i done and cant even count them...they are many...the amount of people i have hurt probably or those who have hurt me....enormous!!! but i cant ignore some of d nice things dat happened to me and d tiny amount of things which made a positive difference because of me.
birthday was pretty much unplanned. my students decided to give me a planned compulsory leave by cancelling all classes...iiiisssshhhh........ so went shopping with Mommy dearest!!!
such a loooooooooooong one for 25....wonder wot it wud b like at 50? an autobiography i guess!!! 
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